A conversation with Sir Vijay Tendulkar

On 17th dec 06, i was at NCPA for my first performance in mumbai,thanx to Thespo8 and Quasar Padamsay. My theatre gang from IT BHU,varanasi had arrived to watch it,12 of them.one of my juniors,abhijeet before coming to mumbai, had a talk with Sir Vijay Tendulkar on phone and had asked for a meeting during his visit to which he had agreed. On 18th march,while all of them were getting ready to leave, abhijeet called him up at 9 AM and tendulkar sir asked to come on 19th as he wasnt well. But when abhijeet said he had a train tonight he asked him to call back at 4.At 4 he asked to come by 6, and abhijeet,vaibhav (one of my lead actors in my last play at campus) and I went to his house to meet him. A modest house in a very modest building. A care taker and a dog welcomed us in and after waiting for 2 mins in a drawing room fitted with almirahs having just books, we were called to where he was sitiing. He asked for introduction and after realising that abhijeet and Vaibhav had come to watch my performance, he said to me “Aise dost hone chahiye”. We told him that we have been doing theatre for quite sometime and we have questions in our mind regarding writing. This is how the whole conversation went….


WE: After reading your plays I got the strength to portary my perception more honestly. But people ask me and they must have asked you also..”Why baby“, “why sakharam“…”is life really so dark and cruel?”

HE: what is your answere to such questions?

US: I tell them,that your plays are an extrapolation of reality. Baby accepted suffering dutifully the way dark people accepted slavery and slaughter…. Acceptance of torture is a way of living…Baby is an extrapolation of reality.

HE: I personally dont bother about people who havn’t seen life. They close their eyes at the sight of suffering as if it doesnt exist. The fact is that life is dark and cruel, its just that you dont care for the truth. You dont want to see it because it might make you uncomfortable. If escapism is your way of living then you will fail to see the truth. I have not written about hypothetical pain or created an imaginary world of sorrow. I am from a middle class family and I have seen the brutal ways of life by keeping my eyes open. My work has come from within me,as an outcome of my observation of the world in which I live. If they want to entertain and make merry, fine go ahead, but I cant do it, I have to speak the truth.

WE: Khamosh!adalat Zari hai,made me realise that to classify people, emotions, relationships into right-wrong, good-evil, fair-unfair is not appropriate. The better classification wud be “comfortable-uncomfortable”. But it is extremely difficult to convince others through writing. what conscious effort do you make to ensure that your point goes accross?

HE: good-bad, right-wrong, once you tag things like that, you lose the abilty to see the complete truth. Criminal is not only a criminal.A murderer can also be a loving father.firstly, Dont tag things. The words which you and I have just used, they are insufficient to describe the picture in totality.Try not getting trapped in the dictionary meaning of words. As for me, I simply care to see and keep my eyes open, what comes out in my writing is natural without the concious effort of convincing or justifying.


WE: At times the charecters we design have the same weaknessess that we have and sketching that charecter honestly would be like accepting your weaknesses. Its difficult to accept your own weaknessess and sufferings and write about them honestly. What should one do?From where does one get courage to write about his own weaknesses honestly?

HE: Maintaining distance between your experiences and writings helps a lot. Its not necessary to write exactly at the time when you have just experienced something. give time, it will give you clarity to see things better. Once you are at a distance fom your experiences, when you see things from outside, you write more honestly. Besides, the pain of writing the truth will always be there, “yeh tapasya ki tarah hai”.,learn to bear it.


WE: At times we feel very strongly about something,but the moment we pen it down it appears very stupid. It all suddenly starts appearing so small after it is written. what should one do?

HE: Dont worry, it happens even with a lot of experienced writers. come back to what you have penned after 10days, 20 days again and again,it will make more sense to you then.

WE: How does one research before writing?

HE: Research is not the right word. I dont deliberately try to find out things before I write. One does not live to write. You live, and writing beomes an offshoot from it. I live my life keeping my eyes open, observing things, and then something comes to me from what I had seen before and I write it down. I feel something and then I expresss my feelings, it comes from within, based on how I have lived.

US: Is it right to do the reverse of this? At times I just want to write, and for that I deliberately search within myself to find something worthy of writing.

HE: I dont do this but then there are various processess of creativity. It might work for you, but it doesnt for me. In this case of Afzal, I am reading all the articles in newspapers and magazines, just gathering information about him gradually. May be some day I might reflect on him.

WE: Our perception of reality is influenced by our own experiences, at times I feel that what I am writing is what I think to be true, but may be the truth is entirely different?

HE: What is reality? The coexistence of the observer and the happening makes the reality. Reality becomes reality only when it is seen. There is nothing like absolute reality.Your perception of what is happening combined with the happening makes the picture of reality complete. Dont get frustrated, write what you see.

WE: How much is it important for a writer to be well read? At times it interferes with your own writing,so doesnt it contaminate it?There is always a fear of borrowed writing?

HE: A man who just sits in his room and reads books without looking at the outside world is only half a man. But if you observe and read too, then it helps you in sharpening the tool of language. It gives you ways of expression. You learn how to express and your language improves which makes it easy to write. Dont worry about the borrowing part as long as you are honest.Your writing will always be influenced by your experiences with other people. will you call it borrowing from them. Reading is just another experience.


WE: When did you start writing?

HE: so many people have asked this question.

WE: We are from middle calss north indian families, where children eigther become doctors or engineers. Theatre and literature is never encouraged, its useless according to parents. We were exposed to theatre at IT BHU at an age of 19-20. So at times we doubt that may be we are too late to begin writing.

HE: ok. I started writing at an early age. But dont worry, about age. Its never too late. I have friends who have started writing at the age of 50 and they write excellently. Just keep going and it will come.

And before we could say any thing else he started coughing badly. He reached for the glass of water on the table and after taking few sips, his hand started shivering badly. He was trying to put the glass back on the table but couldn’t do it. I moved ahead to take the glass from him and he gestured with the other hand-”No”. We left with the words,”we would wish to meet you again later” and he nodded a big yes while still coughing.